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March 2019 // Archive

Date based archive
29 Mar

BLOG 209 OPINIONS

An opinion is judgment someone forms about something that may not be based on facts or knowledge. It typically relates to the quality or worth of something or it can be in the form of advice. The trouble with opinions is that they can hurt us or try to define us. We often hear that we are all entitles to our own opinions, but it is when we share them that can cause troubles. We let other people’s opinion carry merit regardless of the credibility or why they formulated this judgment. We all can relate to letting the opinion of certain people in our lives take reign while others we can easily brush under the rug. Frustrating, especially since at the end of the day an opinion isn’t fact.

It is the game we play of opinions that can socially cause turmoil for us. Your best friend, significant other, and family, all have their opinions. I think of the classic case of brining your new boo home to meet the family worrying what they will they of he or she. We often times pick out an outfit, wear our hair a certain style, wear certain brands, talk a certain way, or even act a certain way, based on what we perceive other’s opinions will be. The concept of not caring what anyone else things is a rare art form.

People will always talk. No one else’s opinion defines you be it that they express their judgment to your face or behind closed doors. Opnions merely make other people feel like they are superior. Don’t define your happiness by the approval rating others give you. You have to take the high road and understand that just because something or someone is good for them, doesn’t mean it is good for you.

In my own life, I want to please every client and personally and impacted by opinions of me. When you strive so hard to help others, it does hurt when a negative opinion interjects. Although few and far in between, I have to take the high road and grow from the statements. I’ve certainly gotten a lot tougher. But I’m a lot happier when I’m not dwelling or worrying about someone’s opinion.

Yes, this is an easier said than done concept, but we have to learn who we want to let in our circle of valued opinions. Define your judging criteria about who matters most when you give merit to any opinion. No one is in charge of your happiness but you. Even now you can have an opinion about what I’m writing about, but hey, I know that opinions are unavoidable and I’m the one who can control how I accept or reject them

21 Mar

Triggers can result from a situation that has or will happen and are usually associated with a negative emotional reaction. A trigger can be a flashback that sets off a memory that can send a person back to the moment in time of trauma. It’s a reminder. This reminder can cause an overwhelming feeling that produces anxiety, sadness, or even panic. Triggers can come in many forms that don’t have to be physical. For example, the date of an anniversary can be a trigger. Sometimes we can predict what will be triggers. For example, watching a scary movie might cause a person to re-live a trauma in their head. Even smells can set a person off. Certain people can be very hyper-sensitive to their triggers. For example, a person recovering from an eating disorder, might be triggered by celebrities and Instagram models that are extremely skinny when they see them.

When the original trauma occurs, we are in flight or fight mode. During this time, short term memory is faulty. The moment in time gets shuffled around and de-prioritized. The situation doesn’t get filed as past event, rather it remains recent and in the short term. This makes the memory easier to recall. Then when similar situations arise, the brain senses the stimuli and recalls the memory. The brain also falls victim to habits. So let’s say someone always smokes while they drive. The brain soon starts to associate driving with smoking, the two go hand I hand, and hence the habit has been formed. The brain then thinks whenever you drive you smoke, and driving becomes a trigger for smoking.

When it comes to triggers that cause us to emotionally eat or avoid exercise, we have to stop and think about the associations. Are the triggers internal or external? Internal would be memories, emotions, or body sensations. Examples include feelings of anger, frustration, feeling out control, feeling vulnerable, pain, sadness or anxiety. External would be people, places, or situations. These include arguments, T.V or movie shows, car accidents, smells, anniversaries, holidays, seeing certain people, or the way relationships panned out. Whatever the case, our why has to be handled and controlled. This involves breathing, grounding ourselves, relaxing, being mindful, and finding support. A life lived by the fear or triggers won’t work. But if you eat like its Thanksgiving every time you see a certain person, then the trigger needs to addressed. We can’t deny what we don’t want to face or we can’t move forward. Our journey is about growth and change, and also diminishing triggers that aim to harm us.

17 Mar

BLOG 207 DENIAL
Denial is the self-belief that something isn’t true. It’s refusing to believe something is true that is being requested or that has been told to you. Denial is a defense mechanism. A statement made is just not true. The situation being faced is just too uncomfortable to acknowledge. Even if there is overwhelming evidence, it just isn’t true to you. Denying that something is wrong is a way to cope with an emotional conflict, stress, or with pain. Living in denial when it comes to your health leads to procrastination, worsening of conditions, and the inability to take proactive measures facing the truth.

Denial is the complete opposite of acceptance. It’s hard to deal with life when it doesn’t happen the way you want it to. It the biggest way we lie to ourselves. It is actually the first defense mechanism we learn and use. For example, when we ate the chocolate we weren’t supposed to and mom or dad asked if we did, we shake our head no even though we scarfed it down. The problem is that avoidance doesn’t make the problem go away. It can help the immediate emotional state of mind, but it can also do more harm then good in the end. Pretending something doesn’t exist doesn’t apply to the real world because we can’t exist in an imaginative state.

When our sense of control is threatened, we go into denial mode. Common scenarios include addiction, eating disorders, illnesses, financial problems, or relationship troubles. It takes a strong character to face these realities and deal with them. Living in denial of a medical diagnosis leads to a race a against time for your health. Living in denial about an addiction leads to high risk for poor health and risky behaviors.

It’s hard. I get it. No one wants to hear what is wrong with them or what they need to do. Problems don’t just go away though without addressing them face on. Therefore, on our fitness journeys, we have to address our health circumstances face on. We have to get to the “heart” of the matter. When I read someone their measurements, it’s facing fears and telling the truth that has to be told. Denial is only a temporary band-aid. It’s time to let the wound be exposed, become the better you, and build the character to be strong, fit, and an inspiration to others who have yet to face their truths.

09 Mar

BLOG 206 CRYING

Shedding tears. Weeping. Wailing. The act of crying results from an emotional state which could be pain, sadness, anger, or happiness. There is a connection between the neurons and the tear duct (lacrimal gland) which comes from the current emotion. When we were babies, we cried to communicate, but as adults we often try to hold back the tears. We might feel ashamed to cry or weak shedding tears in front of someone else. Statistics say that women cry 3 times a month and men at least once. Humans are the only animals to cry tears. There are 3 types of tears.
1. Reflexive tears: contain chemicals
2. Continuous: keep eyes lubricated
3. Emotional: responding to happy or sad

But crying can be healthy. Sometimes letting your guard down is just what the body needs. When you cry, you release tension. Tears contain toxins, so you are releasing them. Crying then improves your mood. It has a calming effect. When we cry, we activate the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) which helps you relax. We feel better after releasing these chemicals. Tears also help cleanse the eye. When someone else notices you are crying, it can be nice to be consoled. Emotional tears release endorphins and oxytocin which make people feel good and reduce pain. You can fall asleep more easily after a good cry.

It isn’t easy to let go and show raw emotion for some people. For others, crying is just part of how they express themselves. Our emotions take a toll on us and crying is our body’s way to release. You have to let your body communicate and not be silent. I’ve seen a multitude of tears at the studio both happy and sad. Our fitness journeys are a whirlwind of emotion filled with joy, pain, truth, and realness. Sometimes this reality hits us and we are proud our ourselves, mad at ourselves, or just ready to change and be open to that concept. Don’t be ashamed of your tears. But hey, let’s aim for those happy ones. You deserve to be happy, and you deserve to shed happy tears. You are strong tears and all, so let that crying just happen. It’s natural to cry.

01 Mar

BLOG 205 PROCRASTINATION

Delaying and postponing. Stalling. Avoiding an issue. Procrastination is the choice to do what is more pleasurable rather than what needs to be accomplished. It is choosing the less urgent task over the more urgent task. It’s that last minute attitude. From everyday chores to an academic assignment, sometimes delaying the task despite the consequence, ends up being the decision. Some people are habitual procrastinators, other wouldn’t dare touch this uncharted territory.

Most of us procrastinate to some degree. We give into the impulse of ignoring a more important task. Sometimes we feel guilty about doing this, and other times we even pass up opportunities to reach our goals. For someone who procrastinates, a to-do list is just out of the question. Sometimes we procrastinate just because we think something is boring. Other times we just would rather do something else.

The trouble is that procrastination is often times associated with laziness. Since you aren’t acting, you aren’t doing. You really have to turn this behavior around and you can. Forget about past procrastination and forgive yourself for your old ways. Focus on doing, not avoiding and start being a committed person. Start having a proactive attitude. Maybe you need to ask someone to hold you accountable. Having someone to check up on you can help. Hey, I am your accountability for exercise. Think of it as peer pressure. Also, reward yourself for being timely and doing what you set out to do. Buy that new toy for a job well done. Think about how good it feels to actually finish something without stress. Choose don’t force yourself to take action right away. Change your mind set that you are now powerful by taking ownership on these tasks.

Your fitness journey is empowering no matter how long it took you to call me and sign up. for some, they say they took 6 months to make the call. It’s the realization that something has to be done….NOW. When we start acting more and doing more, we become more and start to live life. Don’t add more worry or stress that can be completely controlled by you. Procrastination is self-inflicted agony. You owe yourself and your body much more than that. So take today as your day and make the most of what is on your plate. This brings a fresh energy and the future is wide open to embrace.